so i just lost the one thing i care about more than anything. wow. how can i mess things up so bad? i can't freaking believe it. why do all my decisions always seem to screw everything up so horribly? and i still have no idea what happened. gosh. and the best part is, i can't do anything about it. its completely out of my hands. i don't know what to do. i don't even know what to pray for. so that being said, i'm going to go to bed. hopefully i'll feel better tomorrow but i doubt it. but i will still trust my LORD and my God.